Dear Brock,
In your essay you use a lot of quotes from your blogs and essays. This is a good part to have but do not let it take up your entire paper. Do not sit there and rely on your previous work to describe your autoethnography.
I felt as though your flow was kind of jumping around from place to place and there was not well thought out transitions as well. I think you could also come up with something more creative than just talking about senses. There are moods, feelings, or even certain things you do when you write your papers.
When I read your autoethnography I felt as though you just straight bullshitted your way through it. There are good ideas and good points but you do not expand as well as you could on them. To be blunt what I am saying is you are fucking up right now. It is okay though, because that is the point of writing shitty first drafts. Be sure to take more time when writing your final draft and make it the best you possibly can.
Love,
Yourself.
